Friday, January 28, 2011

Pick Me Up

I've been reading other people's blogs. It's a good way to pass the time. Sometimes, I find things on their blogs I wish to steal. Such was the instance recently when reading my friend Jeffery's blog. Posted there were eight rules for picking up women at a bookstore, written by someone other than Jeffery. Oh. M.J.Mewes. That's the fellow.
Here are his rules:

1. Go at night or in the evening, rather than during the day. There is a higher concentration of eligible females during the evening hours at a bookstore. Plus, if you are successful, you can segue into grabbing a quick dinner date with her.
2. Keep your eyes peeled for rings on the left hand. You’ll be more efficient if you skip the married/engaged ladies.
3. When looking for nice women to pick up, visit the literature, video, travel, cooking, and home improvement sections. Avoid the self-help, dieting, and exercise sections. You want a girl who is confident and likes to do fun stuff.
4. If there is a coffee shop in-store, check it for ladies.
5. Next, when approaching a woman, have a visible cooking or home improvement in your hands. Women like a man who can fix stuff, and make a decent meal.
6. Approach the women with whatever pick-up techniques that work best for you. If you’re cute and charming enough, canned lines can pique a woman’s interest. If you do better with a pre-established connection, strike up a conversation about the books each of you are browsing. If you’ve got balls, hand her the cook book you’ve been carrying and point out the meal you’d like her to cook for you.
7. Don’t forget to compliment her looks and taste in books. Flattery will get you everywhere.
8. Don’t flirt obviously with every pretty girl in the store. Women can easily spot a guy who appears to be making pick-up rounds in every aisle. Make the woman feel special by setting your sights on only a couple women, or better, just one.
As a female who spends a more than adequate amount of time a book store, I thought it my duty to weigh in on the rules. Especially since the occasional time is spent day dreaming of a handsome, well read gentleman making himself known to a certain well read single female, say perhaps in the travel section.

1. Obviously go in the evening, unless you're intent on picking up soccer moms and retirees.
2. The ring thing is true. Don't be a bastard.
3. Props to Mewes who looks for confident girls. It might also go well the other way when said maiden sees that you also are confident and intelligent and not just looking for the next big diet fad or get rich quick scheme.
4. It would do well for you if the coffee shop was rather full, so that you might need to ask fair maiden to share a table. She drinks light roast with just a bit of room for creme.
5. Cooking or home improvement books are a little too obvious. A current events, travel, or outdoor magazine would do fine, as would any well respected novel or book of essays.
6. Don't be an idiot. Translation: Don't used canned pick up lines. You're in a book store. Talk about books. (Unless you're in the music section, then you have the liberty of speaking of music.) If you want to be "that guy," show her the meal in the cook book you'll make for her.
7. Yup. And don't forget the coffee.
8. What are you, on the prowl? Chill out.

But the BEST way to pick up a girl at the book store is if you happen to be there doing a signing and you're not Tony Robbins. It would do you really well if you were this guy or this guy. If you're not, figure out what these guys are writing about, then come back and buy the girl a cup of coffee and talk about those guys' words along with your traveling adventures, humanitarian aid work, music collection, and your dog,

1 comment:

  1. Oh gosh, #5 and #6 bother me so much, ESPECIALLY the last line in #6. If a guy handed me a cookbook and pointed out a meal I could cook for him, he'd have a black eye from the book being launched back into his face. I barely cook for myself, and for a man I met two minutes beforehand to point out (even in a flirting way) that I should cook for him is just so so insulting.

    Frankly, these pick up tip things sort of bother me. Here's my pick up tip: Treat her like a human being. Don't just "act interested." Be genuinely interested. Show her that you are interested in getting to know her because something she did genuinely caught your attention, not because she happened to be standing in the most convenient aisle for you.

    Ugh, ahaha, this list bothered me.