Tuesday, November 23, 2010

I'm (Not) On A Boat!

I wrote this a while ago, when I was still one of those seminary kids. It was a creative project for a class. I randomly thought of it a few minutes ago, when I was thinking about being completely disenchanted with life. I'm not really sure why it took on the tone that it did. Lots of stuff I write ends up writing itself..and those are usually the better pieces.

Based on Matt 14:22-33

Yo, Pete

You go mad or sumpin’, Brothuh? What was you thinkin’? Don’t you know rocks sink? That’s wha’ yer name means, right? Rock? Was it ‘cuz you had rocks fer brains? Steppin’ out the boat like that. You musta done gone crazy, man. Maniac.

See this boat I’m a standin’ in all safe and sound like? See how I’m all dry and warm? You was out ‘ere coughin’ and a snortin’ out all the watuh that done washed right up yer nose. Yer buddies all starin’ wide-eyed at ya, thinkin’ they really be fishers of men now, ‘specially fer you.

Yessuh, I’m a fairly certain you had to ‘ve lost yer marbles. I ain’t talkin’ ‘bout those shiny shooters ya get at the dime store, neither. No suh, you was out yer mind. You won’t erer see me steppin’ out this boat. Uh-uh. No way. I ain’t no fool. Not like you.

Didn’t ya see them waves? ‘Bout a mile high! You just lucky you didn’t a get swept right out t’sea. Wind was a howlin’ ‘bout a thousand miles an hour, ya idiot.

That dude you was a-chasin’ woulda got there eventually. No need fer you to be jumpin’ ship just ta prove sumpin’. Who’s ya tryin’ to prove sumpin to, anyhow? Yaself? Yer buddies up ‘ere on board the boat? That shadowy dude out ‘ere on the watuh? I jus’ don’t get it, man. Ya left all ‘at safety and s’curity for a stormy swim. Why’d ya do it? You lucky that dude grab ya when he did. Fish food otherwise, brothuh.

Anywho, I jus wanna write you this letter, let ya know I think ya crazy. Don’t get out’the boat again, man. I hope you a learned yer lesson. Take it from me. I’m a jus gonna sit right here in my lil’ raft. Watch ‘uh world go by. Ya enjoy th’ watuh.

Yers Truly,

One mighty concerned dude

Dear Concerned Fella,

You gotta get out ‘the boat, man. The only thing holdin’ ya back are fears and insecurities, and I tell ya, that jus’ won’t do. You wanna let those win, then you jus’ stay there in yer little raft of false security. You keep tellin’ yerself you’ll be alright.

Ya, I’m aware I looked a fool, but there’s only one place fer me, and that’s where he was and where he a called me. Ya didn’t see the look in his eye when he said that one little word. “Come,” he said. Well, I a tell ya, there wasn’t no time to waste after ‘at.

‘Sides. I ‘as the one who asked him if I could come out ‘ere. I mean, I ‘spose I was a expectin’ him to say, “just a hold on, I’ll be right ‘ere,” but he didn’ and after that there was a no holdin’ back. I couldn’t a lived with myself if I’d a stayed put. So I went.

Nearly peed my robe, too. Yer right. Those waves seemed a mile high. Wind seemed a thousan’ miles an hour. Scared the hell outta me. (Good thing I got the keys to Hev’n.) An’ I tell ya, I hadn’t even finished yelpin’ “Help me!” when he grabbed me an’ pulled me up from that current. Mighty strong ‘un, too.

But ya, see, nuthin’ woulda happened if’n I hadn’t a gone out ‘ere in that storm. I’d a lived my simple lil’ life, all the time a wishin’ I’d just taken that lil’ risk and stepped out. Ya gotta take a risk, friend. It’ll be aight. He ‘on’t let ya go nowhere. But nowhere's the only place you'll go if’n you don’t step out. You can a keep yer raft, fella. I’m a gonna walk on watuh again and again.


Simon “The Rock” Peter

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